i’ve just added tumblr to my everlasting list of online connectors. i now have this blog, twitter, fbook, flickr, and i’m sure i just disconnected myself from a bunch more because yes, just what my title entails i’ve lost my password, username and i can’t for the life of me remember why i even started that page in the first place.
i remember eo-last year, i cleaned out my inbox for gmail. i signed up to so many newsletters, which i thought at the time was useful to get notifications for. but the more in line i am to these updates, nothing really changes in the real world. they just get added on to the list. & then it’s on to the next one…
it’s hard to get your life together, i get it. specially when you have too many distractions. & it’s funny cause we do it to ourselves. we don’t stray away from these distractions, they obviously don’t just appear before our eyes, we invite them in. we embrace them with open arms. thinking back to what we would do without them.
that’s all there is now. some people worry about being alone, about being bored (at work for sure) but outside of that 9-5 job, you my friend are just wasting your time. i am the type of person who does not keep lists, well i lied, i do but i never look at them ever again after creation.. because again easily distracted me, is already on to the next one.
you will never like your life if you compare it to someone better and you will always think someone elses life is better than yours because you hate the life you’re living. it’s easy to chant, i love my life, i love my life but everything is disposable. again… on to the next one. One minute you are happy and the next you are miserable as heck. grown ups (mentioning as if i’m not one _yet) make it look so effin easy & i thought i figured it out but they have insecurities too (it never ends does it). but i guess if you’re working towards something or someone like a dependent i guess you would look very put together too.
so i guess let’s make some babies. but honestly, i’m not ready for that. i can barely wrap my fingers around being married. being a slave to someone other than myself. being affected by what the significant other is doing to themselves (i know i sound like i don’t have a significant other _& yet i do). i will rant about him but he’s not nearly where i want him to be and heck neither am i. I have people to look up to but i can’t, i chose not to effin grow up. i want to be a baby for life.
*ends run-on rantings